I had always imagined having boys when I thought about our future children and I felt comfortable with that idea. We even had a boy name picked out pretty early during pregnancy!



Every single “test” we had tried (for fun, not because we put any stock in them) said we were having a boy. Even the “Ajax Test” which my Aunt Becky said has always been right! 😉

So, imagine our shock (one year ago today) to find out during our ultrasound that we were having a girl!



It took me many weeks to get used to the idea of having a girl, and I honestly wasn’t excited. It took me just as long to figure out why.

I started to write the following blog post nearly a year ago and never finished, but I felt that it was worth sharing today.

I read a couple of quotes a month or so ago that go through my mind just about every day now as I am preparing to bring a child into this world:

“Beyond what we could ever say to our children, the greatest teaching tool we have is the example of our own lives.“ – James Robison 

“Are you the adult that you want your child to grow up to be?” 

I never imagined myself raising a daughter, so despite the fact that we’ve known for almost six weeks that our little baby is a girl, it’s still such a strange thought for me. 

It took me awhile to figure out the reason, but I think I know what it is: 

I am intimidated at the thought of raising a daughter in today’s world. I am nervous about being the adult that I want her to grow up to be because I am so very aware of my own faults, failures, weaknesses, etc.  and I question my ability to parent her well.

I think I wanted boys because, subconsciously, I figured Brennan would have a lot of influence on boys and assumed they would look to him more than to me for an example. Yes, I would have influence, but they would look to him for an example of what a godly man looks like, just like girls would look to me.

Now that I have a girl, I am so thankful. Tori has been such a joy since day one and I am so in love with her. She is beautiful and so sweet! 

I no longer feel fearful of raising her; I am more fearful that I won’t have the opportunity.

God has shown me in the past seven months that I am capable of raising a girl because He is my guide.  He is my source of strength and wisdom. 

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. (‭Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭13‬ NLT)

Even though Tori is still a baby, God has already used her to bring change to my life and I can’t wait to see how He continues to use her.

Though I never had imagined having a daughter, now I truly cannot imagine my life without Tori, which drives me to prayer even more. 

Lord, please let us keep her…but, may Your will be done, no matter the outcome.

Team Tori on Facebook