My children love to build with blocks and Legos. They have become quite good at stacking them higher and higher and are always so proud of their creations. However, when … Continue reading Building and Rebuilding
Today Caleb broke the handle off of my favorite coffee mug. This mug was given to me while Tori was sick and I love that it has both giraffes and … Continue reading Strength & Scars
Today was the first time in ninety-eight days that I was by myself with the boys all day long. Brennan returned to work on Friday but my parents were still … Continue reading Day One after Ninety-Eight
Our family has now been home for eighty-two days. I remember when it was going to be thirty days and that seemed so long. We’ve been living under the assumption … Continue reading Eighty-Two Days
A friend recently asked me a two-part question that I have been pondering for days now. She asked: “How has your story of walking through lament – and joy in … Continue reading Lament and Joy
One of the things I have (surprisingly) enjoyed the most about being stuck at home has been the need to be resourceful. Resourceful with food, activities, pretty much everything. It’s … Continue reading Resourcefulness
I can’t help but reflect and be amazed at how the Lord prepared our family, mostly through our church, to be home for a month. Over the course of the … Continue reading Embracing the Togetherness
I knew that this trip to California would be the most challenging yet with our 20-month old twin toddlers, so I scoured the Internet for ideas of how to entertain … Continue reading Travel With Toddlers
We all have preconceived notions and expectations about what our lives will look like. For me, I always assumed that I’d marry fairly young and have a family (like generations … Continue reading I’m Not the Mom I Thought I’d Be
Our boys are sixteen months old now. They walk everywhere, they love being outside, and they love experiencing new things.
Most of the time I feel as though we have struck a great balance between being home and going out to do things, but some days I feel this pressure to do everything. If I find out we have to miss some event or function, I feel like they are missing out. I feel pressure.
This isn’t a pressure induced by social media, however. Yesterday I realized that it’s because all I’ve ever known as a parent is limited time. A deadline. A looming end point and the danger of permanent regret.
With Tori, we had less than two years to try to give her all the experiences we could manage. Krabbe robbed us of time. Krabbe made us feel rushed. We did things she was far too young to appreciate because there was pressure. We didn’t have time to waste. We didn’t want to have any regrets for her, or for us as a family. And, thankfully, we don’t.
Yet, I have to stop and remember that, Lord willing, we have time with the twins. We don’t have to do everything right now, and we don’t have to be disappointed if we don’t take them everywhere to do it all at this age. They don’t know what they’re missing, and if they are happy, that is all that matters. We have the freedom to wait until they can better appreciate whatever it is we want them to see/experience.
I’m praying that my heart can rest in that hopeful knowledge, that I can be better at just taking one day at a time, one moment at a time, and providing the boys with a well-balanced life. Rest is equally as important as stimulation and experiences, and I pray that we as parents will have the wisdom to do what is best.
I’m so thankful for this gift of time.