Red Bluff, California is not a very exciting place…this is nothing new, however, it is so much more evident to me now that I am back in this little town of 13,000 people. As I drove through town today (a trip which lasted about 10 minutes) I realized that almost nothing has changed. The same ol’ people, same ol’ hangouts…same feel to this town. I feel out of place, to say the least, and perhaps that is because I am no longer the same Lesa Close who left this small town 3 years ago; yet, everyone seems to be basically the same.

I am definitely ready to go back to APU. Things with my dad are no better than when I left last May for Pennsylvania…I thought perhaps he would realize that I am not a child anymore…that I have been through so mcuh and that I have changed so much in the past 7 months…that I am capable of handling my own responsibilities…that I am worthy of respect…I have been here for less than 2 days…and already I feel as if he does not want me to be around…I just don’t understand why he is so upset with me all the time…why I cannot do anything right.

Sigh…somethings never change, no matter how great our desire for that change must be. It can’t be all that bad, can it? ……….